"No one can motivate you to do anything. You motivate yourself based on information you receive and how directly you can relate it to your own potential achievement."
If you ever suffered from depression, finding the motivation,
purpose or drive to get out of bed—let alone have a productive day—can seem impossible
at times. For others, the daily ritual
of starting the work day can run a gamut of emotions; from anticipation and
excitement to apprehension and dread. Add fear, unemployment, school closures,
isolation, protests, riots and the daily grind of life to the mix, finding
motivation to do anything can feel impossible.
Have you ever asked yourself, “What motivates me to give my
very best each day?” Is it money? Is it appreciation? Is it the people you work with? Is it the customers you serve or service to
others? Is it the feeling of
accomplishment? We all are motivated by
one or a combination of reasons that stimulates the reward chemical in our
brain that pushes us to act.
Many of you may have heard of the book, The 5 Love
Languages written by Gary Chapman.
It’s a relationship book about learning how to communicate with your
partner in a way that makes them feel loved.
Chapman lists five different love languages: words of affirmation,
acts of service, receiving gifts, quality time and physical touch. According to Chapman, the key to a successful
relationship is the ability to identify and express the love language that
best meets the needs and expectations of your partner.
So, let’s go back to the question I started with, “What
motivates you to give your very best each day?”
Does your answer include any of the love languages? (Let’s go ahead and
leave out physical touch for obvious reasons).
The expression of love that we respond best to from a partner can be very
similar to what motivates us to give our best each day in other aspect of our
life, including work.
For example, my primary love language is words of affirmation; meaning that I am motivated by praise, acknowledgement, recognition and words
of encouragement. I’m not too proud to
admit it. I’m needy. I also feel motivated through motivating
others. Nothing has made me wake up more
excited about coming to work than knowing that I have the opportunity to serve
and motivate YOU. Being able to identify
my love language allows me the opportunity to communicate my needs to others and
also be an active participant in creating rewarding work.
We usually don’t think of motivation as our responsibility
to create. We typically assume it comes
from an external place that we have no control over. It’s just not true. The
following are a few examples of the different love languages and how you can
take control of your own motivation:
1. Words of Affirmation- If you need words of encouragement, feedback, praise and acknowledgement— then hand them out yourself. The more you spread positivity and take the time to praise others, the more likely that people will do the same for you when the time comes. Ask your supervisor if you can add a “shout out” agenda item to every staff meeting. Be the voice that changes the corporate culture. When someone does something great, tell them. Better yet, tell their supervisor.
2. Quality Time- To feel motivated, you may need
additional direction, coaching and bonding time with your supervisor. Take the initiative and ask your supervisor
if you can have regular face time. They don’t know what you need until you tell
them. Or perhaps you work better in a
team and get motivated by regular brainstorming sessions. Ask your supervisor if you can
lead weekly or monthly team-building, idea sharing or getting-to-know you activities with your
co-workers.
3. Acts of Service- If serving customers or others
is what motivates you, make sure you apply for organizations whose Mission it is
to serve and/or job positions where you get to directly
serve customers. Often times, people
will promote or take a position for the pay and quickly realize it’s the wrong
fit and their motivation and performance suffers. Volunteer for company committees or organize and lead a company-wide volunteer day.
4. Receiving Gifts- Monetary reimbursement might be
what motivates you and/or makes you feel appreciated. To some, compensation equals appreciation,
accomplishment and success. It could
also mean you feel appreciated through incentives, recognition awards,
appreciation gifts or bonuses. If this
is your love language, one way to create motivation for yourself would be to
communicate with your supervisor your interest in promoting. You must take an active approach. Don’t assume leaders know your
ambitions. Also, volunteer for committees,
attend leadership training and ask for a mentor in the position you have your
eye on.
I’m going to challenge you today to find what truly motivates you and take control and ownership over getting that need met. Ultimately, we only have control over our emotions, actions, dreams and passion. I've been guilty my entire life of relying on others to make me happy, feel loved and feel good enough. No one will be more motivated to do good by you than
Let's embrace Mondays, and everyday, with excitement. We will do it together, each Monday —for a moment.
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